Write a letter where your conscience apologizes to you.
Dear Brown-Eyed Girl,
I'm sorry. I know you are angry with me. I have to admit, that brownie looked delicious, all dense and fudgy with that gooey caramel oozing out the middle. But you'd already eaten half the pan! And poor Mr. Brown Eyes hadn't gotten any. So can you blame me if I pricked you and held you back from stabbing the brownie with your fork and gobbling it up? Your thighs will thank me later.
Maybe it's not just the brownie. Maybe it's a culmination of things I've done that has made you scowl every time I try to talk to you. Do I have to apologize for every single one? Because I'm not going to. I refuse to apologize for all those things that were for your own good. I've just been looking out for you. That's my job! Yes, I know you meant it when you swore you'd never forgive your best friend for snubbing you at her wedding. But I knew you'd miss her too much; that's why I guilted you into accepting her very sincere apology. And you would miss her, wouldn't you? See? Aren't you glad you have me around?
So go ahead, be mad at me for all those times I encouraged you to hug Mr. Brown Eyes instead of railing at him, when I convinced you $150 was just too much for a bathing suit, when I suggested quite strongly that it would be in your best interest to ask your sister before borrowing her brand new dress. I stand by my decisions. They were all for your good. Where would you be without me? That's right, you'd be angry at your husband, $150 poorer, and most likely black and blue from your sister's rage. You're welcome.
You know what? I don't care if you're mad. It doesn't make any difference. I'll still be here, even if you stop listening to me. But I know you won't. You like me too much. Remember when I told you to go back to the store and pay for that movie the cashier forgot to charge you for? That made you feel pretty good, didn't it? See? I'm not all bad.
So don't stay mad at me.
I bet Mr. Brown Eyes will share the brownie with you.
Feel free to contribute your own response to the writing prompt in the comments section.
My conscience really does make me mad sometimes,
The Brown-Eyed Girl